A.P.A vs Lux Imperatoris: A Holy Smackdown

20/11/44,265 ·

The A.P.A were enjoying their new turf before being descended upon by the horde of god bothers known as the Lux Imperatoris. The Battle for the A.P.A was on. 

The man known only as Bear was furious with a pre battle bribe delivered by the lone dome runner. ‘Smeg That’ …….. he grabbed the unlucky dreg by his servo claw swigged his wild snake XVXXIX…. soon the runner spilt the beans on the enemy crew.

The A.P.A felt confident they could beat the zealots after the information was divulged. The A.P.A would regret thinking that rep was all that matters as these smelly monks were clearly well funded. 

The reason for the clash was due to the A.P.A accidentally discovering a warp artifact that could awaken the dead with a little blood and voodoo. The artifact was currently being used as a beer coaster in Arms Master Sevens quarters. 

The A.P.A fought hard taking first and second blood with trusty buckshot but the high ground and range of the Cawdor Rebels heavy stubber and long rifle was increasingly taking its toll.

Anyone who thought these gangers were poor and destitute were poorly informed with one pox ridden ganger pulling out a warpstorm bolter… A smegging warpstorm bolter and the another a melta charge shot.

………That dome runners in for a kicking shouted Bear.

It was two crates to one in the favour of Cawdor, but one of their crates contained nothing but Yarricks old porn slates which held no value to the holier than thou enemies. 

Despite Cawdors lack of luck in the wounding department they did manage to set fire to almost everything that moved. Jariya Sensei was effectively a candle with how long he was on fire. How he managed to run in between the lines of fire, into certain death, ablaze without going out of action only attests to the man’s fortitude. Despite how cool it was he’s not allowed in the club house because he stinks of burnt hair. 

Lee and Neal KO’d, Zoro with an eye missing, two others pinned.  

Luckily Arms-Master Yarrick managed to pummel a dual chain axe champion into a critical condition. New boy Dai  Bo managed to pin the the cult leader to secure the other flank. 

With no idea what the actual fight was about the A.P.A decided to get the hell out of dodge and the match was declared a tie. 

Author

  • I am Bradshaw, the most fearless and outspoken journalist in The Drake Sector. I was born and raised in the ash wastes, where I learned to survive and fight against the harsh environment and the ruthless nomads. I joined the Underhive Times as a rookie reporter, hoping to expose the corruption and injustice that plague the hive city. I soon earned a reputation for my hard-hitting and controversial stories, which often put me in danger from the gangs and the authorities.

    I am also a loyal member of the A.P.A, a new gang formed by my best friend Farooq, a former gladiator and mercenary. The A.P.A stands for Acolytes Protection Agency, and we offer our services as bodyguards and enforcers to anyone who can afford us and are not afraid to get involved in House conflicts, especially if we see an opportunity to make a profit or a headline.

    If you want to know the truth about what’s going on in the underhive, you need to read my articles. I don’t sugarcoat anything, and I don’t hold back. I tell it like it is, no matter who I offend or anger. I am the voice of the people, and I won’t be silenced. I am Bradshaw, and I am the best journalist in Necromunda.

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